How To Build Trust After Infidelity In Your Relationship
However, even though it’s quite possible to get your relationship back on track, first of all, you must be really serious about wanting this to happen. You can’t be half-hearted in your approach or desire for reconciliation. There’s absolutely no point in trying to save your marriage or relationship if you’re not fully committed to making it work.
Now, after trust has been broken, a relationship or marriage can be very fragile. Often, a sense of betrayal is all that’s playing on the mind of the one who’s been cheated on. So, if you’re the cheater, be prepared to do some serious making up!
How Can You Rebuild Trust After Infidelity In A Relationship?
The obvious place to start is by ending the affair. Once you have ended the affair and broken off all contact with the third party, you then must convince your partner that everything is done and dusted. Attempting to save the relationship with your spouse or partner if you’re still seeing your lover, is simply asking…no! begging for trouble and destroying any hope of success!
You need to sit down and really consider why you cheated on your partner. Perhaps it was about wanting to sleep with someone new, due to boredom or lack of physical or sexual excitement in your present relationship. Or, maybe it was a reaction to an emotional need not being fulfilled by your spouse?
It’s imperative that you and your partner work out what was missing in your relationship and this can only be achieved through open and honest communication with one another.
However, whatever you do, don’t make your spouse or partner think or feel that they were solely to blame for you cheating in the relationship. Maybe there were extenuating circumstances, or your partner did, in some way, cause you to stray from the straight and narrow, but, you must take responsibility for your actions and mistakes!
Analyze this! Why didn’t you talk things over with your spouse or partner if you thought something was amiss in your relationship?
Or, was it easier just to go and have an affair? (Just some food for thought!)
Winning Back Trust After Cheating - How Long Will It Take?
You’re going to have to work diligently at getting back your spouse’s, boyfriend’s or girlfriend’s trust after infidelity. And, winning it won’t simply happen over night! So, don’t get agitated, frustrated or hot under the collar if you feel you’re being made to jump through hoops to win back their trust. Just remember, you’re the one who strayed in the first place!
Keep this in mind, when you initially met and dated your partner, trust didn’t just magically appear on the first date, in the first week or even during the first month, it took time to build and grow. And, now that you have decimated that trust and faith, rebuilding it will once again take time. So have patience, don’t expect too much too soon!
Perhaps you and your spouse or partner have the best intentions of fixing up your relationship, but you find that neither of you have a single clue on how to deal with things after infidelity, you may feel that you need to seek outside expert help. Visiting a marriage or relationship counselor might be a really wise move.
There’s no point in you both wanting to save the relationship, if you don’t know how to go about it. More than likely, you’ll do yourselves and your relationship more damage, possibly ending up in a worse situation than you are already!
Just be comforted by the fact that relationships can be saved and you can truly rebuild trust. After infidelity has reared it’s ugly head, and you’ve been able to work through all the issues, finally deciding what you share is worth keeping, maybe you’ll discover a key to a successful and happy relationship.
Namely, being open, honest, understanding and respectful toward each other about your needs and wants as individuals, and as a couple, is a great start.